Gord's Guide to SMS-while-Driving in Malaysia

Being a country full of procrastinators, Malaysians have rush at the very last minutes before reaching a destination. If they could brush teeth in the car, they would. It's not surprising that they like to multitask in a car.

That's why we have people doing SMS while driving. It is a special multitasking skill that requires a lot of practice to get it perfect.

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Why Malaysian SMS-while-Driving?

-SMS is a lot cheaper than making short calls. They get to save cost.
-They refused to get caught talking on the phone while driving. Police can't issue a ticket for people who do text messaging in the car.
-They enjoy looking at handphone screens.
-Driving is boring. Doing text-messaging seems to be a fun side activity in the car.
-There are nothing interesting to see outside the cars.
-Malaysian drivers are perpetually stuck in traffic jams. SMS is quite convenient in times like this.

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How to do that?

[Automatic Transmission Car]- You have to learn how to maneuver the steering wheel with one hand. Make sure you slow down your speed and look for open spaces where other cars are not too close to you. Pick up your phone and start texting; with the phone in sight, level to the windscreen so that you can still see what's ahead of you. While texting, type a few words (depending on your speed) and give a few intermissions between 5 seconds to look at the road to make sure you're still 'inside' the lane.

[Manual Transmission Car]- This is a little bit more tricky. You need to use both your hands to drive the car. The only time when your left hand is available is when you're not switching gear. Hence, you can only do SMS when you're driving at a constant speed and does not require to switch gear. Follow the same step as the AutoCar method. However, when gear switch is required, you need to put down your phone first and do it first before you pick it up back to resume your SMS.

[Train Driver]- You can SMS all you want. Just make sure you stop doing it before arriving at the next station so that you stop the train in time.

[Motorbike]- One hand must at all time hold the handle and kept at constant speed. Use another hand to text. Do the same intermissions check every few seconds. If you're an expert, you can do the 'hand-less' trick and SMS with both your hands on a straight road.

[Bicycle]- Same as Motorbike.

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We should do 'SMS-while-Driving competition' nationwide. This competition is judged by speed and accuracy of the messages. It is also judged by how smooth the driving is and how efficient we handle the fuel consumptions.

Grand Prize: Installation of AirBags, Special Seat Belts and Bumpers.
Second Prize: Installation of AirBags.
Consolation Prizes: 10x Helmets